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Student Spiked Teacher’s Coffee With Butt Pills

Butt Pills
Gluteboost.com

If you’re specifically looking to enhance your backside, an herbal product called GluteBoost claims that it can help you out. However, you can count Ellen Vic from North Carolina among its unsatisfied users — the 61 year-old high school teacher didn’t know she was ingesting it. Police are investigating a high school student who allegedly spiked Vick’s coffee with the supplement.

The Gluteboost’s website states (rather fancifully) that their pills are “formulated to naturally enhance your buttocks while shredding fat from unwanted areas.” While the product doesn’t seem to be at all dangerous, our guess is Ms. Vick wasn’t necessarily ecstatic with being dosed against her will. Check out the police report.

According to the Smoking Gun article, no one’s been arrested just yet, but word has it that administrators have “diciplined” the student.

What’s an appropriate punishment for something like this? We aren’t certain, but if the students of Independence High School begin seeing some young kid walking around with giant buttocks, we’ve found our answer. In the meantime, kids: don’t believe every ad you read on the internet — even if it comes with a picture of someone wearing a labcoat.

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