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Hilarious Survey Reveals Americans Like Witches and Hemorrhoids More Than Congress

John Boehner
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With the government shutdown rolling on, it’s no surprise to hear Americans don’t exactly have a high opinion of Congress.

But what’s really amazing is what Americans like more than the politicians who have stood by while the shutdown happened.

Here are the results of a survey asking 500 registered voters for their feelings about Congress compared to other hot-button topics. It seems Americans like witches more than Congress (that’s good, since Halloween is right around the corner), but actually prefer Congress to Miley Cyrus and twerking. We wonder if the numbers will change the longer the shutdown drags on.

What do you have a higher opinion of?

Congress: 32%
Witches
: 46%

Congress: 31%
Hemorrhoids
: 53%

Congress: 18%
Jury Duty
: 73%

Congress: 46%
Miley Cyrus
: 31%

Congress: 40%
Dog Poop
: 47%

Congress: 47%
Toenail fungus
: 44%

Congress: 42%
Cockroaches
: 44%

Congress: 20%
My Mother-in-Law
: 64%

Congress: 24%
DMV
: 58%

Congress: 42%
Honey Boo Boo
: 33%

Congress: 36%
Potholes
: 47%

Congress: 37%
Twerking
: 33%

Congress: 37%
Zombies
: 43%

[Public Policy Polling]

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