Animal Feces Found on NFL Football Players’ Mouthguards
When it comes to putting things in our mouth, we don’t get grossed out by a lot of stuff. Unless our ladies are a little funky downtown, then that’s straight up gross. But other than that, we’ll kick back with an ice cold bull testicle beer or down a cup of cat poop coffeeÂ with no problem.
But let’s talk about inedible stuff, like football players’ mouth guards. Those things are in athletes’ mouths for hours on end, and thereâs no way the guys clean all that saliva crust off post-games. So youâd think after a while there would be a little nasty dirt buildup but nothing totally disgusting like animal feces, right?
Well folks, football players are suckinâ on animal poop. Itâs true– a recent test of Indianapolis Coltsâ mouthguards revealed the guys had a boatload of delicious substances hanging out in their mouths during games, like âblood, sputum, mouth discharges (tobacco products), chemicals, animal fecesâ. Mmm sputum– tasty!
When punter Pat McAfee was given the list of said substances and saw âanimal fecesâ was on there, he didnât know what it was. After being corrected, the dude replied, âGod, thatâs embarrassing I misread that. I kind of pride myself on my reading skills. Iâm huge on grammar, and Iâm reading âanimal fences.ââ
You keep suckinâ on that poop, McAfee. Itâs doing your brain real good.