5 Reasons Why a Cheeseburger is Better Than an iPhone 5

So, the iPhone 5 just came out and has taken over all the headlines. Well, I’m here to say it’s not the greatest thing ever. As a matter of fact, I personally feel like a good ol’ cheeseburger is better than that silly iPhone 5. I’m so confident of the cheeseburger’s dominance over the i5, that I’ve compiled a tasty little list of reasons for you.

1. Burgers are the perfect compliment to cold beer. iPhones definitely are not. When was the last time you drank a bunch of beer then made a wise decision with your iPhone? Exactly. Burgers, on the other hand, are never bad with beer.

2. iPhones are expensive. Starting cost of an iPhone 5 is around $200. You can buy 50-75 burgers with $200, but with that same amount, you’ll only have 1 iPhone 5.

3. Cheeseburgers don’t talk back like that Siri gal. You can enjoy a good burger in peace and quiet without the attitude of that little lady Siri.

4. All iPhones are the same, essentially. Aside from a couple of colors and memory size, they’re all little lemmings that have no identity. Each Cheeseburger has its own taste, character, and personality.

5. You can’t put bacon on an iPhone 5 and eat it. Well, I guess you could try but you’d break a tooth. Granted, there are tons of bacon apps for the iPhone, but it’s not the same as biting down on a burger with freshly cooked bacon. Bacon makes everything better.

There you have it, 5 solid reasons why a cheeseburger is better than an iPhone 5.

Is it possible that I’m an iPhone freak that’s just a bit upset that he doesn’t have an iPhone 5? Yeah, that’s a distinct possibility, I really want one. I’ll just have to live with my i4 for the time being.